If you’ve been following the five-part series so far, congratulations on making it to the end! If you’re just joining and would like to catch up on parts one, two, three or four first, please feel free and then come back to this once you’re ready. It’s not required to read about the steps of the WEIRD process in any particular order, though they are designed to be followed in order. Let’s explore the final step, Deliver On Your Dream!
What is Deliver On Your Dream?
The Deliver On Your Dream stage is when you’ve made enough progress in the direction you wish to go that you’ve reached a desired goal and can rest. Note: that’s rest, not stop. Chances are if you’ve read this far in the series, you’re a naturally curious person who loves to learn, experiment, explore and grow. So, if in a few months to a year, you’re ready to tackle another goal, the WEIRD process will be there to help you again. My dad told me all throughout my childhood that no matter what you’re doing, you’re always practicing something and getting better at it. So with at least one cycle of the WEIRD process under your belt, you’ll be even better the next time you use it to take on another change in your life. And you don’t even have to be perfect for the experience to be beneficial!
How do I know I’ve reached this stage?
If you’ve been following the series up until now, you might not be surprised by the answer that, in addition to tracking the metrics you’ve put in place, you should also let your energy be your guide. By checking in with yourself and your nervous system and reflecting often along the course of the journey, you’ll reach a point at which you no longer feel restless, unsettled, wanting more. Your data can tell you certain insights, but it can’t tell you the same story your body can. Like Cinderella, one day you’ll try on a shoe that just…fits. Unlike any other shoe that you’ve tried on before. And unlike Cinderella, maybe your shoe won’t be the most amazing shoe you’ve ever tried on in your life, but it will be comfortable, functional, stylish, and will sufficiently meet your needs enough that you can leave the shoe store without looking any further. While you should never settle in your life, you also don’t need to let perfectionism get in the way of leading a happy life, even if that happiness doesn’t look exactly like you thought it might initially.
Wait…I’m deciding whether or not I’ve reached my goals based on “vibes”? That doesn’t make sense!
Speaking of Cinderella, here’s a “once upon a time” of my own for you. I once worked for a business which had faced a long period of financial setbacks that were directly affecting the staff. The owner called the entire staff into a meeting to address these challenges and take questions. The room was tense and the staff members were not pleased with the situation. One demanded a concrete action plan to resolve the financial challenges, “not based on ‘vibes,’ but based on real data.”
When running a business, it takes both dreams and data. Visionaries must be able to back up their goals and dreams with meaningful metrics. You can’t run a company purely on vibes any more than you can use gravity alone to propel a stopped car up a hill.
However, your body and your life do not operate in the business world. Human beings operate within the laws of nature first, and then the social constructs through which we view and understand ourselves and each other. We’re taught from an early age that in order to be most successful within systems such as school, and later, work, we need to deny our own needs (for example, having to ask permission to go to the bathroom at school) and become part of the group. For those of us who have been socialized as women, and/or who identify as a woman or marginalized gender, there is added pressure to people-please within the systems of family, work and community, and to further prioritize the needs of others above our own.
That is why when pursuing goals in line with our energy, authenticity and values, it helps to give our body more of a say in the decision. Something that looks amazing on paper can ultimately feel terrible to our nervous system and cause burnout.
Not to knock another five-letter acronym, but…
You might be familiar with the SMART method of goal-setting. Have you ever tried to achieve a SMART goal, only to become discouraged along the way and give up because you didn’t reach the exact goal you set out to reach, that you expected would make you happier? SMART goals tend to be less effective than an alternative called “open goals” which are more exploratory in nature.
Sometimes we can become too focused on the goal itself that we forget to enjoy the journey, and might not be able to notice if we arrive at a place that’s actually better for us because it’s not the exact goal. SMART goals trust that we know exactly what we need before we get there. But, as we learned in part four, sometimes there can be gaps between our expectations and reality due to messaging we receive from a variety of influences around us. This is why it’s important to track often and imagine the goal with all five senses so we know how we’ll feel in our body when we’ve reached it.
If you aren’t used to getting in touch with your body, you can learn more about somatic healing techniques or try out my free five-day email mini-course, Modify, Measure, Meditate.
Where do I go from here?
If you feel you’ve arrived at your dream, congratulations! If you’d like, review the journaling you did over the course of the journey and celebrate your progress. Think of yourself on the day you decided to get started and try to remember what you were thinking and how you were feeling. If you’d like, write that version of you a letter sharing where you are now and what you’ve accomplished. This letter is something you can come back to next time you go through the WEIRD process and need some encouragement.
The best way to experience the WEIRD process is in community. If you’d like to go through the content in each part of this series with one or more friends, it can multiply the chances of your success. If you’d like optimized community support, even more content, and the support of a coach, consider signing up for Get WEIRD! - the official course implementing the WEIRD process. No matter what you choose to do from here, know that change doesn’t have to be a difficult solo mission - it can be a group quest filled with joy, curiosity, and most importantly, authenticity.
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